Life without parole: The Kentucky Supreme Court has rejected school-shooter Michael Carneal’s request for a new competency hearing. In 1997, Carneal — who was 14 at the time — opened fire at his Paducah high school, killing three classmates and wounding others. He now claims he was mentally ill at the time he pleaded guilty and accepted a life sentence. The state’s highest court says too bad.

Hoosier punishment: IU’s men’s basketball team will be on probation for three years thanks to former coach Kelvin Sampson, who probably won’t be coaching college hoops anytime soon. The NCAA went easy on the team, which got into trouble after Sampson broke recruiting rules. 

Putting food on the table: As a result of skyrocketing unemployment and food prices, more Americans are relying on food stamps than ever before — more than 30 million.

Talking turkey: The New York Times offers some tips on how to pull off a Thanksgiving feast, and a tasty recipe the hardcore carnivores are sure to hate.

The Palinator: And because it’s almost Thanksgiving, here’s an encore presentation: Wonkette’s take on Sarah Palin’s priceless press conference staged in front of an unsettling turkey slaughter. Enjoy!