Papa John’s owner John Schnatter — otherwise known as the only Republican in Louisville crazy enough to support Brooks Wicker’s Congressional campaign — gave his best Herman Cain impersonation on a recent shareholders conference call.
Schnatter, who held a fundraiser in his home for Mitt Romney himself in April, assured his shareholders that he wouldn’t let the dreaded Obamacare affect them, but would instead plunder the wallets of Obama’s weary, yet plump, subjects:
On a conference call last week, CEO and founder John Schnatter (a Mitt Romney supporter and fundraiser) said the health care law’s changes — set to go into effect in 2014 — will result in higher costs for the company — which they vowed to pass onto consumers.
“Our best estimate is that the Obamacare will cost 11 to 14 cents per pizza, or 15 to 20 cents per order from a corporate basis,” Schnatter said.
“We’re not supportive of Obamacare, like most businesses in our industry. But our business model and unit economics are about as ideal as you can get for a food company to absorb Obamacare,” he said.
“If Obamacare is in fact not repealed, we will find tactics to shallow out any Obamacare costs and core strategies to pass that cost onto consumers in order to protect our shareholders best interests,” Schnatter vowed.
Obviously, the thought of paying 13 cents more for a bland pizza so that thousands of cooks and drivers can pay for medical care without going into bankruptcy sounds like something straight out of Stalin’s Soviet Union. But at least there were no shareholders harmed in this gangland (Chicago!) heist.
Anyway, we thought it might be useful to check out Papa John’s “core values” on their website, and see how this little political song and dance jives with them.
We must keep The Main Thing, The Main Thing. We will consistently deliver a traditional Papa John’s superior-quality pizza.
We do what we say we are going to do when we say we are going to do it. We earn the right to hold others to a higher level of accountability by being accountable to ourselves, our customers and our business partners.
But John is more accountable to some than others. Don’t let “business partners” being listed last fool you.
Our customer satisfaction must be consistent, quantifiable and demonstrable. At Papa John’s we expect excellence – the “best in its class” in everything we do.
As hard as providing “excellent” insurance to his employees is for John, maybe this tyrannical power grab can help our country on the path to “superiority” in a few areas where we are… well, less than superior:
US life expectancy- 51st
US infant mortality- 41st
People Are Priority Always. Our success depends upon our ability, as a team, to work together to achieve our goals and expectations.
Unfortunately, Big Brother is forcing their own “goals” and “expectations” of a labor force that is healthy and not in debt for the rest of their life because they can’t pay back their medical bills, ultimately sticking us with the bill. (See: Stalin)
Our goal, Mr. Obama, is to spend $14 on our XL Buffalo Chicken pizza, not $14.12. It’s a little thing called “Liberty.”
If you think you can or you think you can’t – you’re right! The difference between winners and losers is a positive mental attitude. Our attitude is a reflection of what we value: successful team members must be upbeat, proactive and passionate about everything they do.
Successful team members also must have… yeah, sure, the whole “health” thing, whatever.
But speaking of a can do attitude, check out the Big Dog on the block in obesity delivery devices, McDonald’s:
Retailers and restaurants have made a big deal about Obamacare.
But for fast food titan McDonald’s, Obamacare is no worse than a swing in commodity costs.
“I will tell you that we are significantly increasing now that the Supreme Court has ruled increasing our conversation and disclosures with franchisees around what does this mean for brand McDonald’s. So that they can be as educated as possible around what’s happening, so that they can start to anticipate and make any changes if they have to try to minimize the impact of this.
“On just a dollar basis that $10,000 to $30,000, we have the years like last year where commodity cost increases were even greater than that. So while it is a significant item and it’s gaining a lot of attention as the [profit and loss] item we have managed through items of this magnitude in the past. and I’m hopeful we can do that in future.”
I tell you, it’s almost like they’re not interested in whining about pocket change in order to score political points, but rather focusing (See: core value #1) on The Main Thing: Making boatloads of money stuffing people’s faces.
We never stop trying to surpass our previous best. We constantly “Raise the Bar.” No matter how good we are, we will always get better.
Now this is where John seems to be taking his core values to heart. We can always do better and raise that bar. Or in the case of Mitt Romney’s tax rate for people like John Schnatter, who made $2.75 million last year, lower that bar so you can make hundreds of thousands of dollars more to spend on your life of luxury.
But no, Obama and his nanny state minions won’t have that. What kind of core values do we have in this country when we must spend 11 cents more on pizza and rob good men like Schnatter of their hard earned money, just so millions of people can have quality, affordable health care.
It’s downright foreign.